![]() ![]() I usually hear people out, but I often like to advise them by giving my own opinion, which is something that I need to work on. While listening to others, I usually don't really judge that often, although it depends on the person. Or you listen to someone, but in your head you change what they've said so that it fits what you want them to have said.Ĥ.) Word Listening-Word listening is when you listen to what someone is saying, but instead of listening to the meaning of what the person is saying etc., you only listen to the words that the person is saying without making a connection.ĥ.) Self-Centered Listening-Self-centered listening is when you only listen to things that people have to say that are applicable to yourself or that have to do with you. What does it mean to listen with your eyes, heart, and ears?ġ.) Spacing Out-In my opinion, spacing out is when someone is talking to you (ie., a friend, teacher, parent, etc.) but instead of listening to what they are saying, you are thinking about something completely else.Ģ.) Pretend Listening-My definition of pretend listening is when you look like you're listening to someone, and you even shake your head yes, etc., to make it appear as though you are engaged within the conversation, when really you aren't listening at all.ģ.) Selective Listening-Selective listening is when you listen to someone, but you only hear what you want to hear. While listening to others, how often do you find yourself judging, advising, or probing? Write your own definition of the following listening styles: In your own definition, what does it mean to, "Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood"? If you can learn this simple habit-to see things from another's point of view before sharing your own-a whole new world of understanding will be opened up to you. In other words, listen first, talk second. The key to communication and having power and influence with people can be summed up in one sentence: Seek first to understand, then to be understood. As the American Indian proverb goes, 'Listen, or thy tongue will make thee deaf.' Only then can you work through conflict as you think of others before yourself."It's our tendency to want to swoop out of the sky like Superman and solve everyone's problems before we even understand what the problem is. When you take on the character of Christ, the desire to understand before being understood becomes more natural. ![]() Only Jesus can make you more interested in someone else’s interests than in your own. Only Jesus can change my perspective-and yours. So am I! Left to my own devices, I will always choose to look out for myself before I look out for others. You are, by nature, a self-centered person. It’s not easy to think of others before yourself. Even on the cross, he was thinking of you. He was always looking beyond himself to the needs of others. You won’t see their fear, their pain, or the injustice they’ve faced. If you’re not willing to seek to understand and acknowledge other perspectives, you’re not going to be able to see the hurt of other people. All we can see is our own side of things. Everyone has their own perspective, but it seems like no one is willing see anyone else’s perspective. We’re in the thick of a pandemic filled with a lot of heated discussion around the best way to move forward. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had” (NLT). Philippians 2:4-5 says, “Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. Seeking to understand first also allows you to see the other person’s perspective. Did I get this right?” That gives them a chance to correct and not just be understood but also feel understood. You’re saying (repeat to them what you understood they were communicating to you). That’s why you need to say, “You go first.” And then, after they’ve shared, you say, “Now, let me see if I understand. We are often so busy trying to get people to see it our way that we don’t stop to listen to what they are saying. The Bible says, “A person who answers without listening is foolish and disgraceful” (Proverbs 18:13 ICB). You cannot hope to be understood until you are willing to do the same for others. ![]() Try to figure out what the other person is thinking and saying before you start trying to convince them convince them of your side. ![]() Philippians 2:4-5 (NLT) When you’re in conflict, the loving and Christlike way to defuse the tension is to seek to understand before seeking to be understood. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.” “Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. ![]()
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